March 17, 2006
Role-playing.
From a recent thread on the RaptureNYC Yahoo Group:
From: RaptureNY@yahoogroups.com [mailto:RaptureNY@yahoogroups.com] On Behalf Of Mistress Cherry Esplanade
Sent: Thursday, March 16, 2006 10:35 PM
To: RaptureNY@yahoogroups.com
Subject: [RaptureNY] Don't be ashamed.
ek,
I'm deeply sorry that this was your experience, but in my experience, I've not come across that very often. Many, many people are able to come in and have their thirst slaked, and one heck of a good time. For many, it is an addendum to their usual practices, or an occasional indulgence. If I find that a gentleman has a true paraphilia or fetish, and has a partner, I ALWAYS encourage him to open up a dialogue with her so that they may share and nurture this together, and am happy to advise him as to how to do this, and work with him or them.
If your need was so extreme as to become an addiction, that's a problem in and of itself, and would perhaps best be addressed by a kink-friendly health professional. As for the cost issue - did you ever consider joining a lifestyle group like The Eulenspeigel Society or DomSubFriends, or going to kink parties, Paddles, The Fetish Warehouse, or any other organizations where you might find non-paid play partners? There ARE ways to feed your fetish sans the cash you mentioned.
For some people, we Pro-Dommes are an occasional indulgence, an exciting secret, cherished partners, non-judgemental friends, kink advisors, and a myriad of other things. We're not, however, kink vending machines - pay us, and your fetish gets fed. We're human, too, and for all the good ones (and I'd say that Rapture is rich with Good Ones), the interactions and relationships are forged through openness and trust and patience. Through this, we may practice our art.
We can't solve your problems, but we can offer you understanding, and adventure and companionship you might not find elsewhere.
xxxMistress Cherry Esplanade
On Mar 16, 2006, at 8:55 PM, ek wrote:
yes, one could perform their life duties but with addiction to bdsm,
you always to push the limits higher and higher and remember this is
an expensive habit. Take someone special in your life to a 4-star
restaurant in NYC. With wine, two appetizers, two main course, and
dessert, the bill will come to approximately $130 or lower. Most
hotels in big cities cost less than $150 a night. BDSM is surely too
expensive for what you get, and that is the need to come back for
more, a never ending satisfaction.
My warning to this young man is to not mess with it. there are a few
things i use such strong words for but i confidentally say bdsm is
really harmful.
thanks.
--- In RaptureNY@yahoogroups.com, "charles"
>
> What works for one may not work for another. I have to admit that
this can,
> like anything else, be very addictive, but it takes a strong mind to
> separate fantasy from reality when it is necessary. Just like some
people
> can drink and not become alcoholics, I have to disagree with your
> assessment. If the mind is weak, the body surely follows. The
stronger the
> mind, the easier it is to come back to reality.
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: RaptureNY@yahoogroups.com [mailto:RaptureNY@yahoogroups.com]
On Behalf
> Of ek
> Sent: Thursday, March 16, 2006 2:11 AM
> To: RaptureNY@yahoogroups.com
> Subject: [RaptureNY] Re: Already feelish ashamed - Don't buy your
fetish, be
> aware
>
> If you want advice from me, i'm 33, don't mess with bdsm at all; just
> leave it as your fantasy don't even get into it. Watch the pictures,
> even read the stories but DO NOT BUY your fetish.
>
> I first saw a pro-domme in Feb. 2001, I didn't think much of it. I
> always had fantacies about it and figured, "hey, why not." I wasn't
> even ashamed of it by then. The first domme I saw, Sayako, kindly gave
> me a piece of advice that I should have taken more seriously. She said
> "be carefull, this is very addictive."
>
> After my first session, I came back for another one, just wanted to do
> the same stuff again. The first year wasn't bad. I had 4 sessions. In
> 2002, I had 5. But in 2003, i lost control. I needed to do more just
> to get any satisfaction. And you know what, I was leaving every
> session unsatisfied. I was now uncomfortable with sessioning but I
> wanted to satisfy an fetish. I kept buying it and it wasn't doing it.
> By late 2003, I was so frustrated, I would end the sessions with
> arguments but I still would need to do them in a few weeks. I HAD LOST
> MYSELF. My life had took a wrong turn. So, I decided to stop at any
> cost. And I did. I've been clean for two years. I will never buy my
> fetish again. I come to sites like this for entertainment but I won't
> fall into the trap of seeing a domme again. Look at it this way, many
> people watch pornography without going to hookers afterwards. They
> just let what they saw be a fantacy. You're better off keeping your
> fantacies instread of buying them. I hang around sites like this and
> maxfisch to remind me to the abyss one can fall into by getting into
bdsm.
>
> This is advice from somebody who felt emotionally scarred from
> professional bdsm. I feel proud to have walked away and being able to
> stay away. Don't get invovlved.